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I didn't actually mean to hold this video until I was all in a bunch about Supernatural, but I'm glad I did because I am feeling...A Way about the show right now that speaks to why I made this video, and why I like it despite (because of?) how self-indulgent it is.
First: I am tired of Supernatural. That isn't actually a knock at the show - I damn well know what I'm watching and what I'm not watching and what I can and can't expect here - but I am tired. I'm tired of the cycles. I'm tired of the endless unrelenting sadness. I'm tired of Castiel in particular being used as the perpetual damsel in distress with no payoff to the emotional arcs they continue to introduce: issues like feeling worthless, feeling unwanted by his family, feeling suicidal, at one point. These are X Files-level failures. These aren't the kinds of story arcs drawn out for maximum satisfaction when they're resolved, because there's no satisfactory resolution to a story where they've made it canonical that Castiel is in love with Dean Winchester, but they've also made it Very Clear that Castiel and Dean Winchester will never be together in an "in love" way. At this point Castiel has been canonically set up for perpetual unhappiness, not by any logical narrative device but because the show is caught in a bizarre game of chicken between writers, directors and actors who are pressing incredibly hard on Dean/Castiel as a point of emotional turbulence, and....whoever/whatever it is?..that has decided this issue can never, will never, be truly resolved.
I am a Grown Ass Adult who has a PhD in standing away from the text, squinting, and saying "hmm" thoughtfully. My job is to not get too attached professionally. But sometimes, just sometimes, I get really fucking pissed on behalf of Castiel, personally, aggrievedly.
It's not that I don't love Dean: it's just that he is a fuckboy. Real-life. One of my proudest moments was when I tweeted this in response to "Heaven Can't Wait" and Bobo liked it, thereby confirming that Bobo and I are one. He is at his worst when forced to deal with his emotions, and he and Castiel have been in more or less close quarters, not dealing with it, even as Castiel gives up more and more for Dean and only Dean. "I love you" -- and Dean looks away. "It's a gift" -- but Cas has no human context for the *meaning* of a mixtape to Dean's generation. Over and over again there's this perpetual series of near-misses that can't be anything else: have no chance of being anything else.
The Empty is going to be waiting a long time if it expects happiness out of Castiel.
First: I am tired of Supernatural. That isn't actually a knock at the show - I damn well know what I'm watching and what I'm not watching and what I can and can't expect here - but I am tired. I'm tired of the cycles. I'm tired of the endless unrelenting sadness. I'm tired of Castiel in particular being used as the perpetual damsel in distress with no payoff to the emotional arcs they continue to introduce: issues like feeling worthless, feeling unwanted by his family, feeling suicidal, at one point. These are X Files-level failures. These aren't the kinds of story arcs drawn out for maximum satisfaction when they're resolved, because there's no satisfactory resolution to a story where they've made it canonical that Castiel is in love with Dean Winchester, but they've also made it Very Clear that Castiel and Dean Winchester will never be together in an "in love" way. At this point Castiel has been canonically set up for perpetual unhappiness, not by any logical narrative device but because the show is caught in a bizarre game of chicken between writers, directors and actors who are pressing incredibly hard on Dean/Castiel as a point of emotional turbulence, and....whoever/whatever it is?..that has decided this issue can never, will never, be truly resolved.
I am a Grown Ass Adult who has a PhD in standing away from the text, squinting, and saying "hmm" thoughtfully. My job is to not get too attached professionally. But sometimes, just sometimes, I get really fucking pissed on behalf of Castiel, personally, aggrievedly.
It's not that I don't love Dean: it's just that he is a fuckboy. Real-life. One of my proudest moments was when I tweeted this in response to "Heaven Can't Wait" and Bobo liked it, thereby confirming that Bobo and I are one. He is at his worst when forced to deal with his emotions, and he and Castiel have been in more or less close quarters, not dealing with it, even as Castiel gives up more and more for Dean and only Dean. "I love you" -- and Dean looks away. "It's a gift" -- but Cas has no human context for the *meaning* of a mixtape to Dean's generation. Over and over again there's this perpetual series of near-misses that can't be anything else: have no chance of being anything else.
The Empty is going to be waiting a long time if it expects happiness out of Castiel.
